Calling me accident prone would be a vast understatement. My dad likes to joke that instead of being an accident waiting to happen I'm just a full on catastrophe in progress. If it's possible to fall up, down, off through or into (or any other direction you can fathom) something, I'm your girl. It's really quite pathetic, I'll be it, highly entertaining to viewers, I'm sure but still entirely pitiful. The odd thing is that I've never had a cast. Not one. I've broken every one of my fingers, several toes on multiple occasions, my tailbone twice, a couple bones in my hand, my left collarbone, 3 ribs on my right side and 4 on my left, fractured my wrist and I've cracked my right orbital as well as my skull. That is almost thirty bones (including fingers and toes but not including repeat breaks, and there have been plenty of those). That's a lot of breaks. I've also gotten stitches on more occasions than I can even remember, and made many a trip to the ER for various other obscure injuries (e.g. I had an eye-patch for 6 weeks when I was for because I scratched a chunk out of my cornea while jumping on my parents bed and I got second and third degree burns on my hands when I reached into a fire as a one year old). Basically, I'm kind of an idiot, or you could look at it like I'm fearless but really they're kinda the same thing.
Apparently this clumsiness doesn't just apply to bone-breaking and skin marring either, I think it applies to my real life as well. Growing up I thought that having a new best friend every couple months or so was normal. It didn't occur to me that people had the kind of best friend relationships that actually started when they were really little and lasted for years (maybe forever) until I started making good friends with people who already had their "person". I have no person because anyone who could have turned into my person when I was young moved away and I barely talked to them (if at all) after that. But by high school, the customary BFF move evolved from them leaving the state after getting close to me to just plain abandonment. The people I thought I was creating life long friendships with stopped moving away and instead would just change their mind about me somewhere along the way and with no explanation of any kind we were just magically not friends anymore. I was left to conclude either that they were all crazy people who kept finding me only to hurt me intentionally or I was doing something wrong. Being a teenage girl, who was already insecure, I came to the conclusion that it must be my fault. Honestly, I'm still not sure and I'm still not very trusting. SO I find a best friend who is really genuine and we graduate college and low and behold my best friend moves away. Maybe best friends are just not meant to be mine or if they are they are always going to be kept at a distance.
BUT through all of this, I did find people I trust and love in college and even if I feel alone now because they aren't in the same place as I am, I know that distance can't touch the friendship if it's true. You know who you are. Thanks for making me believe.
But maybe I'm wrong and I just have bad luck all around. Oh well.
Of course I could just take my own advice and just live my life and stop analyzing things haha.
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